Dr. Frederick Peterson

What is sexual health and how can I improve my sexual satisfaction?

This is not an easy question to answer concisely, partly because sexual heath is a relatively new and complex concept only about twenty years old. Secondly, answering this question involves some "gender-bender" discussion that may not seem intuitive, as you will read. Finally, it is not an easy question to answer without offending some people’s sensibilities because it requires discussing sex!

The World Health Organization (WHO) considers sexual health "the integration of the physical, emotional, intellectual and social aspects of being sexual that are positively enriching and enhance personality, communication and love. Sexual health is not just the absence of disease, dysfunction or infirmity. It includes a sex-positive approach to one’s own sexuality as well as sexual relationships which are safe and free from coercion, discrimination and violence."

Simply put, sexual health is a state of satisfaction and well-being regarding most things about you as a sexual person.

In other words, sexual health is almost the "opposite" of how our culture has traditionally approached sex, which is to avoid discussing sex at all (if at all possible) and treating it in a sex-negative manner if the topic is addressed.  It is easy to understand why so many Americans find sexual health an unfamiliar topic as most of us grow up in families that do not discuss sex (at least in positive terms).

 The Dimensions of Your Sexual Health

One way to understand sexual health is to review the separate but related areas of your own sexual life and how satisfied you are with these aspects of being a sexual person. Your sexual health can be divided into the twelve basic areas listed below.  Before attempting to improve your sexual satisfaction, you have to understand what it is and what your current level of satisfaction is.  You can get some indication of your level of satisfaction by answering the following questions:

1. Sexual Literacy.
   How much do you think you know about sexuality?
    
2. Sexual Self-image.
   How accepting and satisfied are you of your physical body?
    
3. Sexual Relations.
   How satisfying are you with sexual relations with others?
    
4. Sexual Function.
   How able are you to be aroused to the point of climax?
    
5. Sexual Disease.
   What is your status regarding sexually transmitted infection.
    
6. Sexual Disorders.
   Any problems with sexual pain, sex addiction or sex offenses?
7. Sexual Reproduction.
   Are you able to have children and keep from having them?
8. Sexual Spirituality.
   How do spiritual/religious beliefs influence your sexuality?
9. Sexual Acceptance.
   How satisfying is the acceptance given by your community?
    
10. Sexual Attraction.
    How satisfied are you with your sexual orientation?
     
11. Sex Role.
    How satisfied are you with your masculinity and/or femininity?
     
12. Sex/Gender.
    Are you satisfied with being a man, woman or some combination? 

Numbers 10-12 make up what is considered to be your sexual identity. Your basic sexual identity would be what type of sex/gender you are (male, female or a combination referred to as "trans-gendered"), what type of sex role you have assumed (traditional femininity, traditional masculinity or having qualities of both referred to as "androgyny"), and what gender you are attracted to for sex (men, women or both).  The dimension of sexual attraction is commonly referred to as "sexual orientation" (gay, straight or bi) but this term is not useful when considering trans-gendered people and also implies that your designation (gay, straight or bi) can not change during your life (when it can and does for many people). 

A Gender-Bender Mind Flip

A sexual diversity cube that has twenty seven possible sexual identities. Using a few movie and television stars to illustrate this concept, men can have sexual identities such as a "traditionally masculine man attracted to women" (Clint Eastwood in Dirty Harry) an "androgynous man attracted to women" (the father character Danny from Full House), or a "traditionally feminine man attracted to men" (the friend character Jack from Will & Grace). Of course, there can be masculine men attracted to men, feminine men attracted to women, and so on.

While your basic sexual identity is an important aspect of your overall sexual health, all the other dimensions of your sexuality are very relevant to you enjoying life with a sense of happiness. As a matter of fact, your sexual health is an important aspect of your overall health and well-being as a person. Sexual health can positively enhance or adversely affect all the other areas of your general health, including your physical, emotional, spiritual, occupational and financial health.

Enhancing Sexual Health

Learning more about sexuality is the path to improving your own sexual health as well as enhancing your overall well-being.  The good news is that there is an increasing number of sources for accurate information about sexual health and they are increasingly becoming easier to access, especially through the internet.   The most respected source of information on sexuality is the Sex Education and Information Counsel for the United States (S.E.I.C.U.S.).

While learning more about sexual health is important, it does not necessarily lead to making you more comfortable with your body or make you better at communicating about sex. Some of the other columns will address specific activities to do in order to increase your comfort and satisfaction about sexuality.

More About Doc Pete